Gaslighting and invalidation are both forms of psychological manipulation and emotional abuse. There are however some key differences between the two:
1. Intent: The intent behind gaslighting and invalidation is different. Gaslighting is a *deliberate* attempt to make someone question their own perceptions and memories in order to manipulate and control them. Invalidation, on the other hand, can be a passive or an active act of disregarding or dismissing someone’s feelings and experiences, often leading to feelings of shame, doubt and insecurity.
2. Effect: The effects of gaslighting and invalidation can be similar, but the severity and longevity of these effects may differ. Gaslighting can have a profound and long-lasting impact on a person’s self-esteem, identity, and relationships, while invalidation can be hurtful and damaging in the moment, but may not have as lasting effects.
3. Interaction: The interaction between the abuser and the victim is different in gaslighting and invalidation. Gaslighting often involves direct confrontations, with the manipulator denying facts or events that the victim knows to be true. Invalidation can be more subtle, such as dismissive body language or language that minimises the victim’s experiences.
Both of these forms of emotional abuse can be very hurtful and need to be addressed. I feel however that it’s very important to see the difference between someone’s purposeful attempt to undermine and manipulate you vs an inability or lack of desire to understand you and your perspective.
Often the invalidator is unaware and lack the tools needed for conscious communication.
Knowledge and understanding is power.
What are your thoughts on this? Does reading this bring up any emotions? Do you have anything to add? I love to hear about it below.
Sam Taylor 