3 Signs you may have an Anxious Attachment Style

Anxious attachment style refers to a way of relating to others in which an individuals feel insecure and fearful in their relationships. This can manifest in a number of ways. Here are three signs you MAY have an anxious attachment style:

1. Unhealthy need for Validation and Attention: One way to identify an anxious attachment style is a strong need for constant validation and attention from their partners. They may become upset and/or anxious when they believe that they are not receiving the attention or affection they desire. This may present itself as a constant need for reassurance and affirmation from their partners, or even from sources outside of the relationship.

2. Unhealthy neediness and clinginess: People with an anxious attachment style may have a strong need for close, intimate relationships. They may struggle setting and/ or respecting personal boundaries. This may come from an underlining fear of emotional / physical rejection and/or abandonment.

3. Overthinking and Worrying: Individuals with an anxious attachment style tend to overthink and worry excessively about their relationships. They may constantly overthink the status of the relationship and take a lot of the feedback in the relationship personally. They may feel wrong and/or guilty for all of the “issues” within the relationship and struggle with healthy dialogue.

Trust issues, jealousy/possessiveness amongst others could be signs that you or someone you know has an anxious attachment style. Insecurity and low self-esteem often play a massive role.

Step one is identifying:
“Am I struggling with relating?”
“Do I have an anxious attachment style?”
“Am I getting in the way of a loving healthy relationship?”
“What am I going to do about it?”

Unlearning these “unhealthy” programs can provide instant relief. Communicating this pattern at the beginning of a relationship or within an existing relationship is also key.

NLP and Clinical Hypnotherapy can help break old patterns and install new ones!

Can you see any of these signs in yourself? What helps you when you are running this unconscious “program” / “pattern”?